There won’t be single woman who hadn’t heard of the statement that triggers nearly the title of my writing. For sure who had a really bad day at office, and it’s clearly visible that she was trying to hide it from her boyfriend. She seemed like expecting attention that ‘her boyfriend’ will ask dramatically, “Baby! How Was Your Office Today”/Is Everything Alright With You, My Love?” And He ended up asking a very silly question just because she couldn’t choose the menu of the dine/exchanged her cold eyes several times, that is, the universal question- “It must be your that time of the month, isn’t it?” I’m sure.” Okay!
‘That’ time of the month! Yes that is the phrase mostly good men use instead of saying or asking about periods/menstruation/monthly hormonal cycle women go through. As there is no “time of the day/hour/minute/moment” to address men’s hormonal cycle so, the special phrase is used by the conservative society only for women. It provides unquestionably a ‘special’ attention to address women, particularly women’s sexuality. I won’t brag on her reproduction capability for which she had been kept inside house, because reproduction pays no economic influence that only productions do! Right? Even I won’t prolong the radical issues saying that, ‘menstruation is such a pain in ass, I should have been a boy instead!’ I would rather dignify the insecurity that woman goes through when she is at the cycle. Okay! Leave it! It can be a family problem, an unsettled mental state, or may be it’s not the right time for her. It is just an expression that she wants to give. It is her state of mind. Men, unfortunately, it is not always the ‘Time of the Month’ nor it is ‘Pre/post-menstrual Syndrome’. Sometimes, women just expect the guy to understand her ‘state of mind’ rather than just generalizing her problems with hormonal issues. She might be in need of mental support than physical. Isn’t it?
Yeah sure it happens every month. It bothers. It has immense pain inside. Sometimes the pain is just intolerable. But it is not just PMS always. It is the lack of self-confidence that bothers her more. It is that red color that panics her, freaks her out. It is her sleep cycle that she knows will be interrupted due to menstruation. It is the fear of public exposure. It is her anxiety and shame that she might lag behind in the competent world. It is indeed painful. It is not always a ‘biological pain’; it is a ‘mental soreness’. It is not about ‘elder son/only son’ issue, it is her biological identity crisis. It is about social acceptance and uncertainty. She might be challenged psychologically, financially, might have phobia of getting married soon to an unknown person, and scared of being ‘adjusted’ with her so-called ‘new family’. I have never seen a girl without doubts whether she is established or not. A girl who knew every household yet had doubts on her cooking skills because the judgment is ultimately going to save her marriage, although she was from a prominent marketer background yet had doubts on her own capability. It is not like she was born with doubts; it is the society who doubted since she had ever existed.
PMS (Premenstrual Syndrome), isn’t it another issue to demean womanhood? Did we ever ask them back that, ‘Why can’t I be just annoyed/irritated/upset/depressed on my own?’ ‘Can’t it be only my emotions rather than my biology?’ One can pass the question just by saying, ‘It is scientifically proved.’ Okay! So, who proved this? A castrated woman or ‘un-reproductive man’? Is that proved scientifically or enforced socially and then imposed psychologically to believe/trust that ‘THAT TIME OF THE MONTH’ is the mother of all women ‘mood swings’! Did we? I wonder.